3 Empowering Shadow Work Exercises – A Journey from Dark to Light

Shadow work is a powerful tool to support your personal development journey. Shadow work exercises can help you to step into the most authentic version of yourself helping you to create a sense of wholeness, long-term happiness and a more balanced and fulfilled life overall.

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Key takeouts – shadow work exercises

• Carl Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist, popularised the idea of the ‘shadow self’.
• The shadow self refers to parts of yourself that are often suppressed, denied, or hidden. It also refers to unresolved emotions, such as fears, desires, and behaviour traits that are seen as unacceptable by society and the people around you.
• The shadow self is highly complex and is formed by many factors such as society, our upbringing, cultural influences, as well as any trauma that we might have experienced throughout life.
• Shadow work and shadow work exercises are the process of shining light into these hidden aspects of ourselves aiming to create a sense of wholeness, long-term happiness and a more balanced and fulfilled life overall.

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You can learn a lot about yourself from your shadow. Engaging with your shadow self can lead you to the truth. When I say the truth, I am referring to the most authentic version of yourself.

The truth might not always be pretty, yet the truth is the catalyst for transformation.

There are different ways how you can engage with your shadow self and I am about to share three shadow work exercises with you that I have used in the past and am still using when engaging with my shadow self.

But before we start, please note: I am not a psychologist. What I am sharing here in this blog post is my personal experience with shadow work. Be mindful that shadow work can bring up some uncomfortable emotions. Should you ever feel like you need to talk to a therapist about some things that come up, I recommend seeking help and support.

When you are new to shadow work and start looking into the term shadow work in general, Carl Jung is a name you will come across many times.

Carl Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and he was the person who popularised the idea of the ‘shadow self’.

We won’t talk much about the person Carl Jung, but throughout this blog post, I will drop a few of my favourite quotes that made me curious to start looking into shadow work and also inspired my thinking about shadow work in general.

What is the shadow self

How can I be substantial if I do not cast a shadow? I must have a dark side if I am to be whole.

Carl Jung

Do you have people in your life who seem to get everything they want ALL the time? The promotion, the happy family, the new shiny sports car, luxury weekend trips, a big social circle, you name it…They really have it all, it simply comes to them.

It is what it is, right?

But deep down it still bugs you that they get all these things so easily whereas you have to work so hard for them and still don’t have what they have.

Welcome to your shadow self – jealousy.

Your shadow self refers to those parts of yourself that are often suppressed, denied, or hidden. It also refers to unresolved emotions, such as fears, desires, and behaviour traits that are seen as unacceptable by society and the people around you.

But you can trust your shadow self to come up now and then and reveal your true colours.

How the shadow self forms

One of the first things we learn when we enter this 3D experience is the importance of fitting in.

If you want to survive, you need to fit in.

Society teaches us what is socially acceptable and what isn’t. Behaviours such as sadness, anger, shame, guilt, fear, sexual desires, etc. count as unacceptable in our society. To fit in, you learn that it’s best to hide these parts of yourself that are not accepted by society.

But it’s not just society that forms the shadow self. The shadow self is highly complex and we also have to keep in mind our upbringing, cultural influences, as well as any trauma that we might have experienced throughout life.

We learn to develop a mask and over time this mask becomes our reality.

What is shadow work?

One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.

Carl Jung

Carl Jung believed that we all have a shadow self that consists of these hidden, suppressed, and denied parts and emotions of ourselves.

Shadow work is the process of shining light into these hidden aspects of ourselves.

Doing shadow work is a process of self-exploration, self-reflection, forgiveness, and finally self-acceptance.

As a result, you drop the mask and integrate these hidden parts of yourself into your persona, allowing you to develop a sense of wholeness and live your truth; aligned with who you are, deep down at the essence of your being.

Benefits of shadow work

Shadow work is also a spiritual practice. It can be challenging, but there are many mental health benefits resulting from shadow work.

• Cultivate self-awareness – shadow work encourages self-reflection, leading you to more self-awareness. Self-awareness is key for personal growth and development.
• Deep emotional healing – by engaging with your shadow, you have the opportunity to heal deep emotional wounds. Healing these deep emotional wounds can improve your overall mental well-being as you get a chance to free yourself from emotional baggage.
• Personal growth and transformation – by engaging with your shadow you have the opportunity to release limiting beliefs and behaviour patterns; allowing you to unlock your full potential and step into a greater version of yourself.
• Reach a sense of wholeness – by getting to know and accepting yourself fully you can achieve a greater sense of wholeness. This greater sense of wholeness can bring more self-acceptance and self-love, enabling you to live a more balanced and happier life overall.

What happens when your shadow is ignored

Ignoring the shadow self can lead to a range of psychological and emotional issues. Some of the key consequences are:

• Projection – unacknowledged aspects of our shadow often get projected onto others. We might criticize or judge traits in others that we refuse to see in ourselves. This can lead to strained relationships and a lack of understanding and empathy.
• Internal conflict – denying parts of ourselves creates an internal conflict that can manifest in anxiety, depression or a general sense of unease.
• Missed opportunity for personal growth and development – by ignoring our shadow we miss out on the opportunity to learn more about ourselves.
• Self-sabotage – if not acknowledged, the shadow can express itself in destructive ways like for example self-sabotage where we unconsciously engage in behaviours that hinder our success, happiness and well-being.

The shadow self is part of who we are and holds the keys to deeper self-understanding resulting in our personal growth and development.

By embracing your shadow you step into the most authentic version of yourself helping you to create long-term happiness and a more balanced and fulfilled life overall.

How to do shadow work – 3 shadow work exercises for beginners

Below are 3 shadow work exercises that I have used in the past and am still using when engaging with my shadow.

To get the most out of your shadow work exercises:

• keep in mind that shadow work can bring up some uncomfortable emotions
• be patient with yourself and have compassion for yourself
• if you need a break, take a break
• allow yourself to be honest with yourself

Shadow work is a process of cultivating self-love from within. Be mindful of your needs and desires during this process. Have compassion and understanding for yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help. 

Shadow work exercises # 1: Emotional inquiry through awareness

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.

Carl Jung

Emotional inquiry is a shadow work exercise that you can do pretty much every day by simply bringing more awareness into your daily life.

Whenever you come into a situation where another person annoys you or puts you off, don’t get caught up in being annoyed. Instead, be aware of your reaction and the emotions that come up.

Take a step back and ask yourself:

• What is it that you find so annoying about this person/situation right now?
• What emotions came up for you?
• How can you use these emotions to get a better understanding of yourself?
• Did you feel any physical tension in your body?
• What does this experience tell you about yourself?
• Do you secretly wish you could be like this person?
• Do you maybe have similar behavior traits within you but you have been denying these?
• …

Question yourself, start digging, self-reflect, and allow everything that comes up for you to come up.

Don’t look away, treat everything that comes up as a possible insight about yourself.

Whatever it is that bothers you in other people/situations, is likely to be a disowned part of yourself.

The more you start integrating this disowned part of yourself, the less it will bother you in other people or situations moving forward.

Shadow work exercises # 2: Shadow work journal prompts

Another great shadow work exercise for beginners is journaling with the help of shadow work prompts.

Get yourself a piece of paper or if you have a journal, get your journal.

Set the scene for your shadow work journaling exercise:

• Make yourself comfortable – find a quiet corner in your home and eliminate any distractions
• Ground yourself – take a few deep inhales and exhales through your nose to help ground yourself and become present for your journaling exercise
• Acceptance – allow yourself to write down whatever comes up for you

Next, have a look at the shadow work journal prompts below. Pick 1 or 2 journal prompts you feel drawn to and start journaling.

Shadow work journal prompts:

• Is it easy for you to ask for help? If not, why not? What holds you back?
• What quality do you most dislike in yourself and why?
• What behaviours in other people upset you most and why?
• What makes you feel appreciated and valued?
• Do you self-sabotage? When/what/why do you self-sabotage?
• How do you define success/failure? What does that tell you about yourself?
• What are your personal core values? Do you live in alignment with your personal core values?
• What events/people in your life hurt you the most and why did it/they hurt you?
• How do you tell your story to people around you? Are there any parts that you are leaving out? Why are you leaving them out? What are you afraid of?
• When was the last time you felt truly happy? What do you need to feel happy?
• What personality trait in others do you wish you had?
• Which emotions do you avoid and why?
• When was the last time you opened up to someone and got rejected? How did that make you feel?

Related resources: Awakening your Inner Light: 55 Transformative Shadow Work Journal Prompts for Personal Growth and Healing.

Once you finished your journaling exercise, have a look at your notes.

Contemplate any emotions that might come up and sit with them for a bit.

Allow yourself the time and the space to digest any feelings and emotions that might have come up for you.

Shadow work exercises # 3: Shadow work meditation

If you have an established meditation practice, shadow work meditation might be the perfect shadow work exercise for you. Shadow meditation engages the body, mind and emotions.

Below is an outline of how I approach shadow work meditation.

Please note that meditation is a personal ritual and what works for me, might not necessarily work for you.

Feel free to adapt what feels in alignment with you and change, leave out, replace, etc. what does not feel in alignment with you.

Shadow work meditation – outline:

• Make yourself comfortable – find a quiet corner in your home and eliminate any distractions
• Ground yourself – sit comfortably, on a chair or an easy crossed-leged position; take a few deep inhales and exhales through your nose to help ground yourself and become present for your shadow work meditation
• Acceptance – allow yourself to be honest with yourself
• Observe – shift your awareness inward and
  • imagine a shadow trait that you know about yourself and would like to explore or
  • visualize a past event you would like to get more clarity about your shadow self
• Meet your shadow – allow your shadow to engage with you, feel into it and listen to what your shadow has to tell you
• Practice gratitude – express gratitude towards this emotion and appreciate it’s being
• Integration – accept this emotion as a part of yourself

Be aware that the exploration of emotions might differ from session to session. Some emotions might need to be revisited a few times before they can be fully integrated. Allow yourself the time that you need.

Shadow work exercises – summary & personal experiences

When I started my shadow work journey, I started with # 1 of the shadow work exercises listed above, emotional inquiry. Then I switched to journaling and after some time tried shadow work meditation.

Meditation is something that took me a bit of time to get into, but once I had an established meditation practice, shadow work meditation was one of my go-to shadow work exercises to explore different elements of my shadow self.

See which of the shadow work exercises resonates most with you and start from there.

As mentioned before, shadow work is complex, and to fully explore your shadow, it is good to have different tools and shadow work exercises to hand.

Is shadow work right for you?

Shadow work and shadow work exercises can be a transformative practice, offering deep insights and healing. However, it’s not for everyone.

Below are some considerations to help you decide whether shadow work is right for you:

• Desire for self-improvement – if you are committed to your personal growth, and have a deep desire to connect with your truth, shadow work and shadow work exercises can be a powerful tool for transformation
• Feeling stuck – if you feel stuck in your life and are unsure of how to move forward, shadow work exercises might reveal hidden obstacles or suppressed desires that can guide you along your path
• Openness to change – if you are open to change, shadow work can bring you a range of new perspectives and lead to significant changes in how you view yourself and your life.

From my personal experience with shadow work exercises, I would say that the desire for self-improvement and openness to change are key.

If you are curious and approach your shadow work exercises with an open mind, you will get the most out of this experience.

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Shadow work can be challenging, but in a way, everything related to your personal growth and personal development can feel challenging at times as you are being pushed outside of your comfort zone.

Getting to know my shadow self gave me so many insights about myself, why I am the way I am, why I sometimes can’t help myself even though I know better on paper, why I feel strongly about certain values, why I am living life the way I am, etc.

I 🖤 my darkness, always have, sometimes a bit too much, but I am so deeply grateful for every emotion my shadow has revealed to me over the years.

If you have any further questions about shadow work exercises, feel free to ask away and leave me a comment below.

Related resources that will support your shadow work exercises:

• The Importance Of Core Values in Life – A Powerful Journey From Authenticity To Happiness
• How to Cultivate Self-Love – Practical Tips for a Happier and Healthier You
• Awakening your Inner Light: 55 Transformative Shadow Work Journal Prompts

Stay wild,

Nicolle

Featured image: Photo by Volkan Olmez on Unsplash